Welcome, Marita

Finally, a horse to call my own.

Focus on Life, Week 5: Capture Our Hearts

Festus, one of the many fine ARA steeds. San Acacia, NM, Feb. 2013

So the photo-a-day thing isn't happening; between my work schedule and essential family time I just can't squeeze out enough time for daily photo taking and processing. I'll try to make a weekly post at least, just to keep myself creating, and am happy to link up with other creative people at Studio Sublime... Yesterday gave me plenty of creative opportunities and inspiration: I took the kids and my dad for a ride with Acacia Riding Adventures (ARA), an outfit in San Acacia, NM, that specializes in horseback rides for all ages and experience levels. It was AWESOME. The kids and I were tired and edgy after a long week, me after 20 straight days of non-stop working and traveling with no downtime, but after a few hours of riding Ranger, Char, and Splendor through high-desert chaparral and Rio Grande woodlands we were revived, to say the least.

I felt almost born-again, in fact, and could feel my long-buried love for all things equine finally begin to come back to life. Why long-buried? When you have something and then can't have it anymore because life intervenes and makes it impractical or takes it out of reach, I think you sometimes have to wrap it in a thick shroud and bury it somewhere to dull the keening ache. (To put it dramatically, I guess.) As a child, I lived for horses. I mucked out stalls and cleaned tack and fed and watered horses at a local stable just to be near the horses and to earn riding time. When I was 15 or so, I got too busy, and money had to go elsewhere, and then... somehow 30 years went by during which I was able to ride maybe 3 or 4 times, and having a horse or even access to one was so far out of reach that I had to let go of the desire before it burned a hole in my heart.

Embers can hold heat for far longer than we might think, fading almost to black yet reviving brightly when finally reunited with air and fuel. We'll be riding again very soon, that much I can say for sure.

15/365: Interlude

Drago in the sun, near Magdalena, NM

I took the morning off to take the kids for flu shots, and since getting a shot always sucks I then took them to breakfast before dropping them off at school. Since I had an extra hour before having to head to work, I took a short walk on the property and soon had company, always welcome and especially if it's equine. Drago is one of my favorite of Doc's horses; I haven't ridden him, I just enjoy him walking beside me and occasionally nudging me for treats. This was such a welcome break from the week's busy routine that I might have to do it again soon, once the weather warms up a bit.

Blue Ribbon

I summoned up the courage to enter some of my photographs in the Socorro County Fair, just for the fun of participating, and this photo won a blue ribbon! It's a remake of a color photo I took this past April; I just love the black-and-white/antiquing effect and think it makes this a much more interesting image.

This is my final week of leisure and freedom; next Tuesday I start working in my new career, finally, as a child and family therapist out at the Alamo Navajo Health Center (30 miles northwest of Magdalena). I'm excited about the possibilities and am also gratified to find myself coming full circle, in a way, revisiting and finally benefiting from my 1990s anthropology fieldwork on cross-cultural medicine. Upon launching this new career I'd wanted to jump into training on equine therapy, but since I'll be working mostly with kids my first priority is to get some good training in play therapy. What a great job, huh?

Old Timers 2012: All the Pretty Horses

Alamo Navajo girl readying her horse for the Old Timers Parade, Magdalena, NM, July 2012

I love the Old Timers parade, for the people-watching and happy kids and, most of all, for the pretty horses. There seemed to be fewer this year, but those that walked were beautiful as always. The photo above was my first shot of the day, as we were walking toward the parade, and it's my one of my favorite shots from the whole day. At left you can see this girl riding (an older relative led her) with such composure and grace, and enough confidence to throw candy to the kids lining the road. I hope she won a prize (I'm going to ask the local newspaper editor if he can get me a list of parade participants), and I definitely see a future Miss Alamo Navajo in the making. Other riders included our friend and local beautician Karolyn Rolston with two "besties" who decked themselves and their horses out in pink and feathers and bling-a-ling... some might not find this fitting for such noble animals, but the horses really didn't seem to care.

Karolyn (at right, on Blue) and her posse, Magdalena, NM, July 2012

The New Mexico State Fair Queen and Little Miss Rodeo New Mexico (both below) were also there, along with the Socorro County Rodeo Queen and various princesses. All are beautifully decked out, and they and their horses have amazing poise given the crowds and noise.

The Valencia County Sheriffs ride every year, nicely attired in a more, shall we say, classic style but with a flash of color that really makes them stand out. They also perform a bit of Western dressage several times along the parade route, much to spectators' delight.

Valencia County Sheriffs, Magdalena, NM, July 2012

A pair of mules pulling a wagon and driver were the prettiest mules I've ever seen...

Mules at work, Magdalena, NM, July 2012

... but "our" mule, Goliath (Doc Rolston's trusted pack mule, who Dad says rides like a Cadillac), has the best personality. He wins admirers wherever he goes, including these two cowgirls who paused from rodeo fun to say Hi.

Goliath with two new friends, Magdalena, NM, July 2012

And Goliath bore Maggie on her second Old Timers parade ride, not even needing to be led by Dad (riding Damacio) because he is gentle and Maggie is fast gaining confidence on horseback. I sat out the parade this year but might have to saddle up again next year because, yeah, there just didn't seem to be enough horses for this classic cowboy-town parade.

Maggie and Dad riding across the rodeo grounds after the parade, Magdalena, NM, July 2012

Old Timers 2012 Preview: Watching the Parade

"Wait for me!" Every year this horse watches the parade go by his home on Kelly Road. Magdalena, NM, July 2012

Magdalena's Old Timers Reunion has come and gone, and I got to see more of it than usual this year. I'm just starting to go through the photos and will post several entries on the various themes. One pleasant surprise: my pics of the rodeo came out much better than I'd expected, given I was using a fairly inexpensive long lens, handheld. Someday I'll start using my tripod... maybe.

Equine Therapy

Three generations of riders, near Magdalena, NM, July 2012

Maggie communing with Goliath before the ride

"Horses are highly perceptive animals and very emotionally connected to other horses and even humans.... 

"Horses are so good for personal development because they tend to reflect the emotional state of the human." 

(Pat Parelli, in Harnessing the Power of Equine-Assisted Counseling)

Goliath sidles up to nudge Dad, who usually rides him

"Horses are incredible 

partners 

for humans; 

they make us 

better people 

by learning 

to put 

relationship 

first, 

grow a solid foundation, 

and dedicate ourselves to 

never-ending 

self-improvement."

(Pat Parelli)

"Horses have a remarkable ability to help humans regain confidence, freedom, and a sense of security. Through interaction with them we can learn to connect with our natural wisdom and ultimately become better, more emotionally intelligent human beings."

(Vallerie Coleman, in Harnessing the Power of Equine-Assisted Counseling)

Horseplay

Drago and Precita, Magdalena, NM, April 2012

The New Guys (still getting used to the camera, and to me)

Here are a few more photos from yesterday, including a tender moment between two of the herd's sweetest -- and most spirited -- steeds. I have many, many photos of Doc's horses and keep taking more both to work on shooting technique and because they're so much fun to watch and interact with. When Doc first put them out on Dad's property last summer they watched me warily from afar, then slowly approached (nosing my pockets for treats) but shied away again when I pulled out my camera.

Bringing apples and carrots and just letting the camera hang around my neck helped them get used to it, and now they don't seem to notice it at all. They do get curious when I get down on a knee for a wider-angle shot; yesterday Goliath (the mule in the bottom shot) kept sticking his nose in my ear and nudging the camera. Maybe he was jealous that I wasn't taking more pictures of him... When I was composing the shot at right Goliath had his giant mug on my shoulder. I guess he did me a favor when he snorted right in my ear because it compelled the light grey horse to turn towards me. These two guys are part of Doc's outfitting crew but have been living on another ranch till recently and still don't let me get too close. Time to bring out a bag of apples, I think.

Precita and Goliath (he's annoyed I didn't bring feed out with me), under a beautiful spring sky

Spontaneous Genius

A horse's eye view (by Maggie), Magdalena, NM, March 2012

I wish I could say I took this picture (the second one is a closer crop of the first) based on careful planning and composition, but I didn't even take this. My Maggie picked up my camera and started snapping away yesterday while I was helping to unsaddle the horses, and this shot, as spontaneous as it was, seems to perfectly express her creativity. She sees me doing close-ups all the time, so I'm fairly certain she did choose this perspective on purpose, and we could attribute the cool lens flare and amazing reflection in the horse's eye to luck. Still, Maggie saw something through the viewfinder that compelled her to release the shutter and capture this moment. And so, in yet another medium, my little sprite expresses her creative talents. Maybe I'm biased (ya think?) but I'm awestruck.

Horseplay (29/366)

Precita and the boys, Magdalena, NM, Jan. 2012

Damacio, being shy

Many thanks to all who commented on yesterday's post; your kind words and support helped me pull through kind of a rough day. I knew the photo stuff was bothering me, but there seemed to be something deeper, something more pervasive... Last night as I was journaling it occurred to me that yesterday marked 18 months since my mom passed away. I know anniversary reactions can be strong, but the 18-month mark? Well, as soon as I started thinking about it, a lot of feelings came up and within moments I was in tears; and a half hour later, I was feeling a bit better. I miss my mom. Most days I can deal with it, think about it and let it go; maybe lately I haven't really been letting myself think about it, which is how things build up. Oh, and I haven't been getting out for walks on the property or anywhere else lately... that's never good for morale, right? I finally got out there today to let the dogs burn off some energy, and as always I left feeling so much better. It was dusk, so I only got a few shots of the horses, but they seem used to my camera now and don't shy away as much as they used to... well, usually.

Winter Coat (2/366)

Precita meditating on the mountains, Magdalena, NM, Jan. 2012

Today's 365 366 shoot took me out to the property, where the dogs got a much-needed run and I communed with our friend Doc's horses. They seem to be weathering our stormy weather just fine; I wish I could be as stoic, but then again I don't have a plush winter coat like they do.

Given how much snow we've had in the past month -- over two feet -- I wasn't surprised to see some major patches left despite several sunny days in the 40s and 50s. The ground is very muddy now, seemingly more so than after any of the summer's rains. This bodes well for spring growth, as long as the winter storms don't go away altogether.

Ballad of a Runaway Horse

Precita, Drago, and Blaze roaming the range, Magdalena, NM, June 2011

Since June I've had the great pleasure of being able to go out to my dad's property north of town not only to let the dogs run and enjoy the stillness but also to commune with a small band of horses belonging to friends. It has taken some time to get to know them, for them to trust me and for me to tune into and read their cues so I don't scare or push them away. Now, even if I forget to bring them treats, they seem pleased to see me and usually walk with me and the dogs for a while before heading off to graze on their own. They are proving to be very therapeutic company both for their calm, centered presence and as occasional mirrors for issues I can't see or understand using my "rational," word-dependent left brain.

La bella Precita

Precita, the lone mare in the group, was skittish with me in the beginning and I had to approach her slowly, but over time her trust has grown and now she's usually the first one to find me and the last one to wander away. Sometimes when I'm standing or sitting among the horses she comes up to me and gently nuzzles my hand or even rests her big mug on my shoulder. Other times she comes up and nudges me, then dances away with a little crow-hop and buck as if to say, hey, loosen up -- find your Inner Mustang and play a little, or just bolt and run, whatever it takes to get away from that dust devil kicking up in your head. No words, no analysis, just play for a change.

Today Precita trots up to greet me and nudges my arm just as I'm focusing my camera on a nice shot of near-twins Blaze and Drago mirroring each other perfectly. I'm still feeling raw about something that happened yesterday, and I'm so intent on getting a perfect photograph -- what, am I on assignment from National Geographic here? -- that I push her back and she snorts, which startles Drago who looks like he might break the mirror pattern. Prescita once again nudges me gently and, annoyed that the camera gets shaken again, I put an elbow to her jaw and exclaim "Git!" She rears back from me and then puts her head down by her hooves to rub it, and it's then that I see the chunk of half-dead cholla caught in her mane just behind her ears, the long thorns likely digging deep into her neck. I realize Precita is in fact trying to tell me something important. I can't "hear" her because my head is churning with my own stuff that compels me to callously bat away this creature who simply wants to stand near me and, by the way, would I be so kind as to remove this awful thing digging into her neck.


Just as I reach up toward her, Precita turns tail and bolts up the hill, stopping for a moment to buck the living crap out of some imaginary demon riding her and yanking the reins and spurring her flank raw, then charges over the crest and out of sight. I thought, wow, that's some hell of a tantrum, girl. A hour or so later, as I'm sitting on a rock watching the other horses graze, I feel a soft nudge at my shoulder. I slowly raise my hand to her and she nuzzles it gently, standing quietly behind me as if to say, okay, I'm done now, I'm back, we can be friends again. And finally, I get the cholla out of her mane.

I'm glad she trusted me enough to come back, eventually.

I know that sometimes we forget how to use our words.

And sometimes we just don't want to use our words. Sometimes bolting and bucking and running far away feel so much better than stammering and struggling to say just the right words. We run away just to get it all out, just to say, fine, you weren't really listening anyway so to hell with you. (For now.)

Humans can be really dumb sometimes. They ignore or mistreat or take for granted those who care about them, four-legged and two-legged, then wonder why they get left behind in a cloud of dust. A few wise ones ponder their part in what happened, wait and hope for their runaway friend to come back, and do their best not to callously provoke another galloping tantrum. I understand why Precita runs: she's been penned up and reined in hard and spurred raw, and she never wants to go there again.

Shy

(I know just how you feel, Ed.)

Stormy Weather

The horses have grown their winter coats, and not a moment too soon as cold storms begin blowing across the plains. We got a bit of rain here last night, but the precipitation mostly hung around in the mountains and left a good amount of snow to brighten up the view. I took the dogs for a long run today and visited the horses today to make sure they have flowing water (they do) and just to stand with them in stillness. Blaze let me lean on him for a good while, sheltering me from the brisk winds and occasionally nuzzling my pockets for treats. All I had was an apple Larabar, but he seemed quite pleased with the exchange. As was I.

Shadow Self

Self-portrait (with Apache) in sun and shadow on raw dirt. Magdalena, NM, Oct. 2011

I don't like neglecting my blog, but you know how it is when things press in and choices have to be made. I had to start ramping up my internship hours this week, which means more time in and commuting to/from Albuquerque, so I can finish the program next June and finally start working for money in this new career. Marital/family therapy seems like a great fit for me. And I have lots of ideas for making the career my own with twists like canine and equine therapy for kids (and maybe adults) with PTSD, therapy retreats for couples and families, that sort of thing -- somewhere down the road. In the meantime, I'm working, learning, and taking care of myself and my kids and animals, including spending as much time as I can out on the property in the open air. I love it when the horses come out to greet us, and the dogs take off after rabbits, and the kids start running and climbing and howling like banshees and just letting off steam. If I could build a house out there right now I would, because it is where I find peace almost without effort: I just have to stand for a moment in the stillness, and my soul settles. What a treasure.

The Creative Exchange: In This Moment

Blaze contemplates the setting sun. Magdalena, NM, July 2011

I'm rejoining The Creative Exchange, having lapsed not because I didn't enjoy it but because spring and summer activities have distracted me from regular blogging. But we all need creative time, right? So I hope to get back into the weekly routine and thank you for visiting. It's been a quiet week out here in western New Mexico's high country, where we're anxiously waiting for more rain. I'm especially anxious because despite last week's downpour the Stage 3 restrictions continue in the Magdalena Mountains, which means no hiking. So I feel all the more fortunate that we have property just north of town that, while not mountainous, offers some open, rolling space for stretching our legs and airing out our minds. Having a friend's horses and mule out there makes it even more enjoyable to visit; if I bring carrots or other treats, I have not only canine but also equine walking companions. We're a bit of a motley crew, perhaps, but a happy one.





I see more riding in our future, perhaps this week -- I'm still riding Blaze, Dad rides Damacio (above on the left), the kids ride Goliath (above right), and their friend rides Prescita (below right) and is thinking of buying her but keeping her with her "herd." Our friend the hunting guide rides Ed (below left), who is sweet-natured but a bit feisty and thus not yet a suitable mount for me or Dad till we gain more confidence and skill. Also part of this herd is Drago (not shown here; he was shy yesterday), who is also sweet but a bit undernourished at the moment and needing some riding rehab. The goal is for Maggie to stay on Goliath and for Laz to move up to Damacio, who is currently Dad's mount... well, in good time. For now, we're all getting to know each other, learning or relearning how to ride the range, and waiting for rain.

The Other Side of the Lens: New Old Timers

My little vaqueros, in the only photo I took today

Today was the big day: Dad, the kids and a friend, and I rode in Magdalena's Old Timers Parade! A while back Dad arranged with a local hunting guide and outfitter to graze his horses on our land north of town, and in exchange he has been taking us on short rides to get us used to the horses (I rode constantly as a kid but until a few weeks ago had been on a horse all of 3 times in the last 20 years) and to lead up to longer rides later this summer. Somehow the subject of the Old Timers Parade came up... and there we were today, with me on the other side of the camera for a change!
  

Dad, looking like a pro riding the steadfast Damacio, led Laz and Maggie on Goliath the Imperturbable Mule

To be honest, it was a lot of fun but also a lot more work than I'd anticipated. The cars, buggies, and other horses in the parade and the big noisy crowds along the route provided far more commotion than the horses are used to, and most people who don't ride have no idea how sensitive horses are to their actions. I sure am now; I've been riding Blaze, one of our friends' stalwart pack and guide horses, and his usually calm self dissolved into a skittering, prancing hot mess as the noise level and crowds grew. The kids' friend was on the paint mare Prescita, who is a bit high-strung but usually sweet-tempered, but who just about jumped out of her skin (and out from under her thankfully-experienced rider) as it all pressed in on her. Big kudos to her for handling Prescita so well and keeping her cool.

The big sis of Maggie's BFF rode the very skittish Prescita, who reared in the middle of Highway 60, and I rode my usual steed, Blaze, who decided to be skittish as well -- we had our hands full but stayed the course.

Dad and the kids had much calmer mounts, and we all made it through by staying calm and focusing on the riding even as we smiled and waved to the crowds. I did have to mouth off a bit (my mama-bear side does come out sometimes) to people who drove or rushed way too close, and I rode right up to the Forest Service trucks to ask them not to blare their horns and sirens, something they'd done in parades past. When we got home, I retired into the A/C to shower and watch movies the rest of the day -- fittingly, The Missing (set and filmed here in New Mexico) was on and I got to enjoy some serious horse action, this time from the comfort of my cool lounge chair....

Los Caballeros

Doc, Lazarus, and Dad riding the range

I went riding again today for the third time in two weeks and am really starting to feel comfortable in the saddle again. Lazarus went with me and Dad this time; he's been on a horse before but is still getting comfortable with it, so he rode Goliath the mule and Doc led him for the first half of the ride. Then he felt comfortable enough holding the reins and rode the rest of the way on his own, and said he really enjoyed it. I guess I did, too, because Doc said I was smiling big the whole time. I still am.

I Heart Macro: New Friends

Weathered, Magdalena, NM, June 2011

Didn't get to pick up the camera until this evening, but it was worth the wait to get these shots for the week's I Heart Macro post. The kids and I went out to the property to visit our friends' mule and horses, who are grazing out there for a while... a long while, I hope. They're warming up to us, and we'll start riding them soon -- a fair trade for the forage and running room, don't you think? We'll all start on Goliath the mule (a gentle giant) and switch to the horses as we get more comfortable. I can't wait -- I haven't ridden in a few years and haven't ridden regularly since I was a teenager. Just being around horses again, close up and personal... oh yes, it's heavenly.

Goliath Yawned, Magdalena, NM, June 2011